8-20-12
Two weeks from right now I’ll be in the air, flying home. That seems SO weird! I have exactly one week left in Gulu and the rest of my time with be spent in Jinja doing last minute souvenir shopping and in Kampala getting to see my babies there quickly before I go and packing. I got back to Gulu this afternoon—the rest of my roommates are still in Kampala because of health reasons or prior commitments. They’ll either be back tomorrow or Wednesday. I’ve had the house to myself all day/night. I got some shopping done, did some laundry, finally got to cook a meal (in Kampala I didn’t want to buy groceries because it’s so expensive in the city, and I didn’t want to travel with them). And I’m on season 4 of One Tree Hill…and I’m almost done with my fifth book of the summer (A Thousand Tomorrows).
Two weeks from right now I’ll be in the air, flying home. That seems SO weird! I have exactly one week left in Gulu and the rest of my time with be spent in Jinja doing last minute souvenir shopping and in Kampala getting to see my babies there quickly before I go and packing. I got back to Gulu this afternoon—the rest of my roommates are still in Kampala because of health reasons or prior commitments. They’ll either be back tomorrow or Wednesday. I’ve had the house to myself all day/night. I got some shopping done, did some laundry, finally got to cook a meal (in Kampala I didn’t want to buy groceries because it’s so expensive in the city, and I didn’t want to travel with them). And I’m on season 4 of One Tree Hill…and I’m almost done with my fifth book of the summer (A Thousand Tomorrows).
8-23-12
So, I haven’t blogged in a few days. I think it’s just hitting me how quickly my time in Uganda is going to be over. As of today I have 11 days left in this country…11 days. On Monday Rebecca and I are heading to Jinja until Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. We were going to wait until after the volunteers meeting (which is on Wednesday) to go, but the Watoto staff preferred we leave beforehand. So, I have today, tomorrow, Saturday, Sunday, and a couple hours on Monday left in Gulu. After Monday I won’t be back here in God knows how long…I may not ever be back. Yesterday at work I wanted to get as much time with the babies as possible because I knew the amount of time I could see them was running low. I got some good pictures and videos, but it’s not enough. I’m really going to miss them, and the nannies. I’m going to miss so much about this place. It didn’t help that I had to leave work early (around noon instead of 3:30) because I wasn’t feeling well. I had a really sharp pain in my stomach and it was getting worse as the day went on. It’s getting better now, and I’m hoping whatever it is will go away on its own (I’m my father’s daughter).
I’ve been in a funk for the past few days because I’ll be leaving so soon. I think a lot of it has to do with going back to a life that should be familiar, but I’m not sure what it will look like. So many things have changed since I came to Uganda, in myself and in the people in my life. So many things have changed in my routine—no more college or friends around me all the time. I’ll need to get a full time job and figure out graduate school stuff. And I don’t want to fall back into old habits and just get comfortable/lazy in routine—I want to pursue God and be in relationship with Him just as much back home as I have here, if not more so.
The story below is one the pastor at church shared w/ all of us last weekend. I really liked it so I figured I might as well share it.
A hermit was meditating by a river when a young man interrupted him. "Master, I wish to become your disciple," said the man.
"Why?" replied the hermit. The young man thought for a moment.
"Because I want to find God." The master jumped up, grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, dragged him into the river, and plunged his head under water. After holding him there for a minute, with him kicking and struggling to free himself, the master finally pulled him up out of the river. The young man coughed up water and gasped to get his breath. When he eventually quieted down, the master spoke.
"Tell me, what did you want most of all when you were under water."
"Air!" answered the man.
"Yes" said the master. "Go home and come back to me when you want God as much as you just wanted air."
So, I haven’t blogged in a few days. I think it’s just hitting me how quickly my time in Uganda is going to be over. As of today I have 11 days left in this country…11 days. On Monday Rebecca and I are heading to Jinja until Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. We were going to wait until after the volunteers meeting (which is on Wednesday) to go, but the Watoto staff preferred we leave beforehand. So, I have today, tomorrow, Saturday, Sunday, and a couple hours on Monday left in Gulu. After Monday I won’t be back here in God knows how long…I may not ever be back. Yesterday at work I wanted to get as much time with the babies as possible because I knew the amount of time I could see them was running low. I got some good pictures and videos, but it’s not enough. I’m really going to miss them, and the nannies. I’m going to miss so much about this place. It didn’t help that I had to leave work early (around noon instead of 3:30) because I wasn’t feeling well. I had a really sharp pain in my stomach and it was getting worse as the day went on. It’s getting better now, and I’m hoping whatever it is will go away on its own (I’m my father’s daughter).
I’ve been in a funk for the past few days because I’ll be leaving so soon. I think a lot of it has to do with going back to a life that should be familiar, but I’m not sure what it will look like. So many things have changed since I came to Uganda, in myself and in the people in my life. So many things have changed in my routine—no more college or friends around me all the time. I’ll need to get a full time job and figure out graduate school stuff. And I don’t want to fall back into old habits and just get comfortable/lazy in routine—I want to pursue God and be in relationship with Him just as much back home as I have here, if not more so.
The story below is one the pastor at church shared w/ all of us last weekend. I really liked it so I figured I might as well share it.
A hermit was meditating by a river when a young man interrupted him. "Master, I wish to become your disciple," said the man.
"Why?" replied the hermit. The young man thought for a moment.
"Because I want to find God." The master jumped up, grabbed him by the scruff of his neck, dragged him into the river, and plunged his head under water. After holding him there for a minute, with him kicking and struggling to free himself, the master finally pulled him up out of the river. The young man coughed up water and gasped to get his breath. When he eventually quieted down, the master spoke.
"Tell me, what did you want most of all when you were under water."
"Air!" answered the man.
"Yes" said the master. "Go home and come back to me when you want God as much as you just wanted air."
8-24-12
Today for my blog I’m going to be sharing another journal excerpt from the quiet time I had today. I just finished it a couple minutes ago and it was really good—especially considering what a funk I was in just 24 hours ago. In my journals I usually am writing to God, so when I use the word “You” (or Your) I’m referring to Him, just FYI.
Maybe it was being with the babies today—maybe that’s how You helped me, but I feel a lot better today than I did yesterday. I only have 2 (half) days left at Babies Home here in Gulu. That fact hasn’t really sunk in yet. Then I only have 3 days left at Babies Home in Kampala (Thursday-Saturday). I decided to take Sunday to be with You and then Monday at noon I head to the airport. Wow, a week and three days left—10 days left in Uganda. In June it seemed like I was going to be in Uganda forever, now it feels like the time is slipping through my fingers. I’m so glad You brought me here though—I’ve learned so much and met so many amazing people. Even though I’m nervous/anxious and a bit scared about what lies ahead, I’m so excited for it too. Seeing what You want me to do and where You want me to go to graduate school (if You do) is going to be awesome to see—especially how You make it all come together. I pray You would keep me relying on You for answers and direction. I pray You would give me the strength, energy and motivation to finish things on time, and well. God, I pray I would trust in You and Your plan and wait on You. I pray You would help me to ask others for help when I need it, even if it’s just for advice or to vent. I can’t wait to see what You have in store for me in the year to come.
“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift his countenance (face) upon you and give you peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26)
Lord God, I pray You would do these things to me and for me. I pray You would help me recognize Your graciousness, blessings, and peace. I pray that I would thank You and give You praise in those moments when I recognize them and in moments when I don’t. You are always good, God, even when I don’t see it or feel it.
“…that which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship with us…God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:3,5-9)
Jesus, help me to proclaim the Gospel. Help me feel, listen to, and follow Your promptings and direction. In those moments, give me words to speak Lord—because You are love and You know the heart of every person, You know what they need to hear. Help me not be afraid to talk to others, whether it’s just to start a conversation or to talk about You. Remind me that I don’t know what anyone has prayed for or asked You for—maybe all they want is for someone to talk to them. Lord, help me not deceive myself anymore. Help me walk in the light God, and not by my flesh/desires. Lord Jesus, help me not be a hypocrite—help people on the outside looking in at my life be unable to say/believe that I’m a hypocrite by the way I live, speak and treat others. God, remind me how much of a blessing it is to confess my sins—help me take greater advantage of that, and praying out loud to You. Help me balance giving truth and grace to others, and give me words to do that. Help me give truth and grace to my brothers and sisters the help them grow in You.
“O you who hear prayer, to you shall all flesh come. When iniquities prevail against me, you atone for our transgressions….By awesome deeds you answer us with righteousness…the one who by his strength established the mountains, who stills the roaring seas….You visit the earth and you greatly enrich it.” (Psalm 65:2-3,5-7,9)
This Psalm just shows me how You provide so abundantly and perfectly for all of our needs. Verses 9-13 tell of how You pour out blessings on us and provide all that we need—really the whole Psalm does that, but especially those verses. Remind me of this verse when I’m trying to finish graduate school stuff and when I’m waiting for answers to see where I get it. If I don’t get in, remind me that You give us exactly what we need, exactly when we need it. Lord God, help me do my very best in applying to graduate school (not putting things off to the last minute or not giving it my best effort) so that if I do get rejected I cannot question it’s because of Your will.
“Remind them to be submissive to authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done in righteousness, but according to his own mercy by renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior….These things are excellent and profitable for people. But avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions, and quarrels about the law, for they are unprofitable and worthless.” (Titus 3:1-6,8-9)
Remind me of where I was when You saved me, what You saved me from. Help me to not pass judgment on or make assumptions about others God. Remind me that I am no better than anyone—in fact I may be worse off because You call me to love—I know the Truth and disobey it when I judge or assume things about people. Help me be submissive to You, O God. Help me be the things in verse 2 (not speaking evil of anyone, avoiding quarreling, being gentle and courteous). God, help me avoid the things in verse 9 (foolish controversies, etc.) Help me to recognize what things are good and what things are foolish—give me wisdom and discernment God. Help me take advantage of them once You give them to me.
God doesn’t just give us (fill in the blank). He gives us opportunities to be ______.
Thank You for all You have given me, shown me, taught me, and blessed me with. I am so undeserving of it all, but You love me passed and beyond my weaknesses, short-comings, unbelief and unworthiness. You make me better. You make me want to be better.
Today for my blog I’m going to be sharing another journal excerpt from the quiet time I had today. I just finished it a couple minutes ago and it was really good—especially considering what a funk I was in just 24 hours ago. In my journals I usually am writing to God, so when I use the word “You” (or Your) I’m referring to Him, just FYI.
Maybe it was being with the babies today—maybe that’s how You helped me, but I feel a lot better today than I did yesterday. I only have 2 (half) days left at Babies Home here in Gulu. That fact hasn’t really sunk in yet. Then I only have 3 days left at Babies Home in Kampala (Thursday-Saturday). I decided to take Sunday to be with You and then Monday at noon I head to the airport. Wow, a week and three days left—10 days left in Uganda. In June it seemed like I was going to be in Uganda forever, now it feels like the time is slipping through my fingers. I’m so glad You brought me here though—I’ve learned so much and met so many amazing people. Even though I’m nervous/anxious and a bit scared about what lies ahead, I’m so excited for it too. Seeing what You want me to do and where You want me to go to graduate school (if You do) is going to be awesome to see—especially how You make it all come together. I pray You would keep me relying on You for answers and direction. I pray You would give me the strength, energy and motivation to finish things on time, and well. God, I pray I would trust in You and Your plan and wait on You. I pray You would help me to ask others for help when I need it, even if it’s just for advice or to vent. I can’t wait to see what You have in store for me in the year to come.
“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord lift his countenance (face) upon you and give you peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26)
Lord God, I pray You would do these things to me and for me. I pray You would help me recognize Your graciousness, blessings, and peace. I pray that I would thank You and give You praise in those moments when I recognize them and in moments when I don’t. You are always good, God, even when I don’t see it or feel it.
“…that which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship with us…God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:3,5-9)
Jesus, help me to proclaim the Gospel. Help me feel, listen to, and follow Your promptings and direction. In those moments, give me words to speak Lord—because You are love and You know the heart of every person, You know what they need to hear. Help me not be afraid to talk to others, whether it’s just to start a conversation or to talk about You. Remind me that I don’t know what anyone has prayed for or asked You for—maybe all they want is for someone to talk to them. Lord, help me not deceive myself anymore. Help me walk in the light God, and not by my flesh/desires. Lord Jesus, help me not be a hypocrite—help people on the outside looking in at my life be unable to say/believe that I’m a hypocrite by the way I live, speak and treat others. God, remind me how much of a blessing it is to confess my sins—help me take greater advantage of that, and praying out loud to You. Help me balance giving truth and grace to others, and give me words to do that. Help me give truth and grace to my brothers and sisters the help them grow in You.
“O you who hear prayer, to you shall all flesh come. When iniquities prevail against me, you atone for our transgressions….By awesome deeds you answer us with righteousness…the one who by his strength established the mountains, who stills the roaring seas….You visit the earth and you greatly enrich it.” (Psalm 65:2-3,5-7,9)
This Psalm just shows me how You provide so abundantly and perfectly for all of our needs. Verses 9-13 tell of how You pour out blessings on us and provide all that we need—really the whole Psalm does that, but especially those verses. Remind me of this verse when I’m trying to finish graduate school stuff and when I’m waiting for answers to see where I get it. If I don’t get in, remind me that You give us exactly what we need, exactly when we need it. Lord God, help me do my very best in applying to graduate school (not putting things off to the last minute or not giving it my best effort) so that if I do get rejected I cannot question it’s because of Your will.
“Remind them to be submissive to authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done in righteousness, but according to his own mercy by renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior….These things are excellent and profitable for people. But avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions, and quarrels about the law, for they are unprofitable and worthless.” (Titus 3:1-6,8-9)
Remind me of where I was when You saved me, what You saved me from. Help me to not pass judgment on or make assumptions about others God. Remind me that I am no better than anyone—in fact I may be worse off because You call me to love—I know the Truth and disobey it when I judge or assume things about people. Help me be submissive to You, O God. Help me be the things in verse 2 (not speaking evil of anyone, avoiding quarreling, being gentle and courteous). God, help me avoid the things in verse 9 (foolish controversies, etc.) Help me to recognize what things are good and what things are foolish—give me wisdom and discernment God. Help me take advantage of them once You give them to me.
God doesn’t just give us (fill in the blank). He gives us opportunities to be ______.
Thank You for all You have given me, shown me, taught me, and blessed me with. I am so undeserving of it all, but You love me passed and beyond my weaknesses, short-comings, unbelief and unworthiness. You make me better. You make me want to be better.
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| Me and Joshua |
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| Isaac and me |
8-25-12
We’re in the single digits—9 days until I come home! Today was my last “real” day with the babies in Gulu. Tomorrow I only work from 7-9:30 because church is from 10-12 (and on weekends for morning shift we're done at 12:30. Two and a half hours at the Babies Home tomorrow and I’ll be done working in Gulu, and the babies I take care of nap from 8:30-10:30, so really I only get an hour and a half with them. I got some great pictures with the kids today though, not only with the babies I usually take care of (0-4 months) but also with the Toddlers I’ve come to love. I told the nannies that I work with that tomorrow is my last day and they were so sad and were asking why I didn’t tell them sooner so they could have pampered me my last couple of days J. The nannies here are so amazing and so friendly, I’m really going to miss them too! Last night I reserved a room for Rebecca and I in Jinja from Monday and Tuesday night—we’ll be staying in a double room overlooking the Nile, I am so blessed!!
Monday we’ll leave Gulu for Kampala at 7am and arrive in Kampala around noon. From there we’ll take a matatu into Jinja. Then we’ll probably just get settled in, have dinner and then go to bed and then Tuesday we’ll do a bunch of shopping, sightseeing, and checking out the coffee shops in the area (we’ve been hearing that they’re the best in Uganda). Then we’ll hang out Tuesday night and relax before getting up early Wednesday morning to take a matatu back to Kampala. Then Wenesday is our volunteer meeting (at 2pm)---it’ll be my last one. Between Thursday and Sunday I’ll have my appreciation dinner, where myself and any other volunteers going home soon will be treated to dinner at a really nice restaurant with some of the Watoto Staff. It’s weird to think that when Rebecca and I arrive in Kampala on Monday it’ll be exactly a week (to the hour) that I’ll be heading to the airport.
Saying goodbye to the babies today was kind-of hard—just like on safari where I tried to impress in my memory the scenery and the noises and the look of the animals, today I tried to permanently hold each babies image, each smell and noise and silly face, into my memory. I’m going to miss those babies so much, I’m already missing them and I still have a couple hours with them.
Yesterday I also downloaded the safari pictures to my computer—they’re so great! They only capture of fraction of the beauty of the place and the experience, but they’re amazing nonetheless. I’ve gotten to do so many things in the past three months; I can’t believe this dream is almost over. But all good things must come to an end right? Otherwise how could you happen upon the next great dream, the next amazing chapter in your life?
We’re in the single digits—9 days until I come home! Today was my last “real” day with the babies in Gulu. Tomorrow I only work from 7-9:30 because church is from 10-12 (and on weekends for morning shift we're done at 12:30. Two and a half hours at the Babies Home tomorrow and I’ll be done working in Gulu, and the babies I take care of nap from 8:30-10:30, so really I only get an hour and a half with them. I got some great pictures with the kids today though, not only with the babies I usually take care of (0-4 months) but also with the Toddlers I’ve come to love. I told the nannies that I work with that tomorrow is my last day and they were so sad and were asking why I didn’t tell them sooner so they could have pampered me my last couple of days J. The nannies here are so amazing and so friendly, I’m really going to miss them too! Last night I reserved a room for Rebecca and I in Jinja from Monday and Tuesday night—we’ll be staying in a double room overlooking the Nile, I am so blessed!!
Monday we’ll leave Gulu for Kampala at 7am and arrive in Kampala around noon. From there we’ll take a matatu into Jinja. Then we’ll probably just get settled in, have dinner and then go to bed and then Tuesday we’ll do a bunch of shopping, sightseeing, and checking out the coffee shops in the area (we’ve been hearing that they’re the best in Uganda). Then we’ll hang out Tuesday night and relax before getting up early Wednesday morning to take a matatu back to Kampala. Then Wenesday is our volunteer meeting (at 2pm)---it’ll be my last one. Between Thursday and Sunday I’ll have my appreciation dinner, where myself and any other volunteers going home soon will be treated to dinner at a really nice restaurant with some of the Watoto Staff. It’s weird to think that when Rebecca and I arrive in Kampala on Monday it’ll be exactly a week (to the hour) that I’ll be heading to the airport.
Saying goodbye to the babies today was kind-of hard—just like on safari where I tried to impress in my memory the scenery and the noises and the look of the animals, today I tried to permanently hold each babies image, each smell and noise and silly face, into my memory. I’m going to miss those babies so much, I’m already missing them and I still have a couple hours with them.
Yesterday I also downloaded the safari pictures to my computer—they’re so great! They only capture of fraction of the beauty of the place and the experience, but they’re amazing nonetheless. I’ve gotten to do so many things in the past three months; I can’t believe this dream is almost over. But all good things must come to an end right? Otherwise how could you happen upon the next great dream, the next amazing chapter in your life?
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| Me, Dennis, Angel, little Steven, Benjamin, Daniella, big Steven (bottom) |
Michelle,
ReplyDeleteThis weeks blog seemed to be very spiritual and reflective, I assume it is because your time there is nearing the end, The pictures are amazing! I love them! Can't wait to see you in 9 days. Single digits YES!!!